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Never tell me the odds
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Summary: For comment_fic prompt: ST Reboot; Star Wars fusion. This is a snippet from what would be A New Hope :3 It's a bit of fluffy humor - enjoy!

"Aren't you a little short to be a Stormtrooper?" the young woman drawled from her position on the cell bunk.

"What? Oh." Jim Kirk fumbled to get the smelly helmet off his head. "I'm not one of them. I'm here to rescue you!"

Despite the sounds of laser fire out in the corridor, Princess Uhura didn't seem in a rush to believe him. She narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. "What do you mean?"

"That droid you sent, I've got it and I'm here with Pike!"

"Admiral Pike?" Uhura jumped to her feet. "Come on!"

They hugged the wall as they made their way down the corridor. Ahead Jim could see Scotty and Spock shielding themselves behind the metal braces sectioning off the corridor.

"Shit," Jim muttered.

"Some rescue," Uhura said, glaring at the three men.

They were close enough that Scotty heard her and sent her a broad smile. "Well, Lass, if you can call in the calvary..."

Jim pulled out his comm link to contact the android. "Chekov, is there another way out?"

"No, sir," Chekov's voice crackled through the transmission. "Only one vay out through the security room. Sir, ten units have been ordered to your location!"

Spock glanced sidelong at Scotty. "The odds of successfully navigating through our enemies with all of us alive are--"

"Unbelievably small, got it," Jim interrupted. "Hey - wait!" Uhura yanked the blaster from Jim's grip and pointed it at a grid near the floor on the opposite wall.

"Someone's gotta save our asses," she snapped. She fired and returned the blaster to Jim. "C'mon, boys, into the garbage shoot." She took the lead, jumping through boots first.

Jim blinked dumbly at the still smoking hole. "What the...?"

"Is the lass crazy?" Scotty asked as he fired again into the growing number of stormtroopers gathering at the corridor entry.

Spock returned to the firefight with calm precision. "I believe the princess has come up with a unique possible solution to the situation we find ourselves in. The probability of surviving this endeavor increases by 5.46% if we follow her."

Jim shrugged. "Alrighty. See you in the stink and slime!" With a last burst of laser fire in the direction of the Stormtroopers, Jim dove head-first into the shoot.


Now I want art to go with this....